Monday and Tuesday, January 5/6 2009

Initially as I read Unclaimed Experience by Cathy Caruth and Forgetting Lot's Wife by Martin Harries, the concepts were not easily grasped nor did they make much sense. Through rereading and by taking notes as I read I was able to grasp the major concepts from each section. Especially in Forgetting Lot's Wife the scope of what Harries is talking about seemed so bound by the examples given at first. After contemplating Lot's wife's look backward for a while, it made a little bit more sense. Lot's wife was looking back to remember whatever it was about Sodom and Gomorrah that made it her home. The punishment for looking back is a way to remind ourselves that to look back is not always the best way to deal with things. In the class discussion, it was brought up that Abraham was able to look at Sodom and Gomorrah after the destruction was complete while Lot's wife was turned into a pillar of salt when she looked back during the act of destruction. If one accepts this parable as a metaphor, it may be seen that Abraham's look represents the observation and reflection of a trauma after it has been completed while the look of Lot's wife is the attempt to understand a trauma while it is in progress. Both Freud and Caruth investigated the idea of not understanding a trauma, an unconsciousness during the trauma during which it cannot be accessed, processed, or contemplated or understood. Lot's wife attempted to cross over that gap of knowing and not knowing and was unable to complete the process.

I felt especially drawn to the "unwitting repetition of traumatic events" as described by both Caruth and Freud. In Freud's allegory of Tancred and Clorinda, Tancred wounds his Clorinda twice completely by accident. He meant to traumatize neither himself nor his love either time but did so twice in a row. The unintentional repetition of undergoing trauma reminds me of the daughter with an abusive/alcoholic father who seeks out those types of men. Daughters ending up with their fathers in the end is an unintentional repetition of trauma based on childhood experiences with a masculine figure. Childhood traumas more often than not come back to haunt the children as they become adults, no matter the trauma. What is most painful as a child becomes most stimulating as an adult.

The "oscillation between a crisis of death and the correlative crisis of life" was also an especially interesting concept to me. After a trauma, one has to deal with the trauma itself and being after the trauma. How does one form an identity after undergoing a severe trauma in childhood? In adulthood, that child has to deal with what happened to them and how to go on from there, which can sometimes be harder than understanding what happened and why it happened in the first place. An identity formed around trauma is generally an unhealthy one as trauma is painful, frequently unexpected, and can alter the perception of the victim radically about him/herself as well as the world around him/her. Likewise, forming an identity of a society, a country, or a culture from a trauma is unhealthy in its altered perception, fears, pains, and surprise.

**SHERLOCK HOLMES** Sherlock Holmes solved crimes and mysteries. What better example of looking back at the past to understand than that of solving a crime that has been committed?



When reading Caruth's assessment of Freud's Moses and Monotheism, I was struck by Freud's absolute revision of Jewish history. To say that there were in fact TWO Moses', one of whom was murdered and replaced with a Priest of Yahweh the Volcano God is an interesting point to make as well as a completely confusing one. Why would Freud stretch the truth to such a length? The following explanation of consequences for the current Jewish people and the anti-semitism that they encounter (World War II for example) would hold if the base of the first Moses being murdered was true. As it is, this exercise of speculation is just that, an exercise. Though it has no practical application to explain anti-semitism, it can be useful in interpreting trauma and understanding some if not all of a trauma. Freud's theories on the creation of a history based on a trauma are also interesting. The question 'what does it mean for history ot be the history of a trauma' is posed and is then, in a way, answered. The answer Freud gives is as such: "a history is only a history of a trauma if the victim doesn't fully understand the trauma as it occurs". In both my own speculation and the class discussion the question arose, "In most events, traumatic or not, is it really possible to understand everything as it occurs?" Even a positive and non-traumatizing event can bring unexpected consequences and unintended implications. Even a positive event can include things that aren't necessarily readily available and/or easily understood. With this in mind, Freud's answer to Freud's question is incomplete at best. A history is the history of a trauma when decisions, development, and value-judgements are based on the traumatic event. The history of the United States since 9/11 has primarily been the history of that traumatic event. We have gone to war, we are in an economic crisis, and the entire country is suffering because of this event and our decisions, development, and value-judgements post 9/11.



**SORROW BY FLYLEAF** Sorrow is a song by Flyleaf, and as you can probably guess by the title, it's sort of sad. It's sad, but also hopeful.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWmXBYDFcqg

**IMAGINARY BY EVANESCENCE** This song is about a false world, one where the narrator escapes to to avoid reality. The unconsciousness involved in forgetting a trauma can be helped by the avoidance of reality itself. In a world that is of your own creation, everything is as you want it to be and the trauma doesn't exist. Tthe idea of a world without trauma, even if it imaginary is a nice thought.



**BLISS 9I DON'T WANT TO KNOW) BY HINDER** To not remember or to drown out the memories is a common reaction to trauma, While this particular song concentrates on the ending of a relationship, the theme of blocking things out is solid.